Generating More Unsolicited Referrals That Actually Turn Into Good-Fit Clients

Author: Bill Cates, CSP, CPAE

Guest Contributor

Some advisors refer to Bill Cates as The G.O.A.T. of Relationship Marketing. Others call him the O.G. This is because for over 30 years he has helped thousands of advisors cut through the clutter, build reputations in their niche, and communicate value that resonates – and gets results.

Bill is the author of 8 books, including: Get More Referrals Now, Beyond Referrals, Radical Relevance, and The Language of Referrals.

Bill is the founder of The Cates Academy for Relationship Marketing™, as well as the host of the acclaimed Top Advisor Podcast – now ranked in the Top 3% of podcasts worldwide.

In 2024, Bill was named the #7 Influencer for Financial Advisors in a survey by Indigo Marketing.

Bill is also somewhat of an adventurer. He has trekked through the Himalayas of Nepal and the Andes of Peru. He has lived on a houseboat in Kashmir India, climbed Machu Picchu , reached the summit of Mt. Kilimanjaro, camped in the Arctic Circle, cycled through Vietnam… and Bill has toured the country as the drummer in a rock and roll band.

Why Referrals Without Asking?

I'm a big believer in asking for referrals and introductions. I've invested 30+ years helping advisors learn how to do this without pushing, pleading, begging, or bribing.

With that said, I know that many advisors never seem to become comfortable with a direct ask. They're concerned about hurting a relationship, feeling awkward, and even hearing a client say, "I'm not comfortable with referrals".

I appreciate these concerns and with the right process these concerns can fade away. However, this article will focus on referrals without asking. We can address the asking part in a future piece.

Not Just Referrals

In this article I will use  the words referrals and introductions interchangeably. However, they are not the same. A referral is a loose term that means different things to different people. And for some, it can even have a negative connotation if they've had a bad experience in the past. A referral doesn't necessarily mean a connection. It could be word of mouth, a suggestion, or a recommendation (without connection).

Even though I will be using the term referral in this piece, consider that term "for internal use only". What we really need these days are introductions and connections.

Also, by "unsolicited referrals," I don't mean passive. There is nothing passive about creating referrals and introductions. One must do the work of becoming referable, letting clients know that introductions are welcome, and turning a client's willingness to refer or introduce into a meaningful connection with the prospect.

In our noisy world where no one answers their phone unless they know whose calling, and ignore emails from unknown sources, it's virtually impossible to reach people without an introduction. In my book, Radical Relevance, I provide 17 rules for becoming relevant with prospects.

Rule #1: The straightest line to relevance with a prospect is an introduction from someone they already trust.

One of the biggest challenges advisors face in client acquisition is ' inertia'. Prospects are stuck in their own inertia – either doing nothing or just stuck in their current relationships. To paraphrase Newton's First Law of Motion, "A body in motion tends to remain in motion and a body at rest tends to remain at rest unless acted upon by an outside force".

Advisors need to disrupt that inertia – to wake up a prospect to consider new options. An introduction from a trusted source can become that outside force.

With prospects, clients, and centers of influence – favor the words introduction and connection. We should use the words that represent what we want.

Unsolicited Referrals Are A Barometer

Most advisors get some referrals without asking. And those count – as long as the prospects fit the advisor's desired profile. Unsolicited referrals are an indication that your value is worth sharing.

When interviewing advisors interested in my coaching programs, I always ask, "Are you getting unsolicited referrals?" The responses fall into three main categories:

1. Yes, but they don't always fit my profile.
2. Yes, and I know I could be getting a lot more if I had the right process in place.
3. Not really. My clients love me, but I don't get many referrals.

When I get that third response, I usually say, "Let's go back to that 'my clients love me' part". Everyone who does great work and builds strong relationships should be getting some referrals without asking.

Here's a trust hierarchy to consider:

1. Client satisfaction with an advisor's critical core work and the overall working relationship will create client satisfaction and loyalty. Both are important.
2. Going beyond core advisory work and getting to know your clients really well – building business friendships – will start to generate unsolicited referrals.
3. Creating client transformations – where the client feels their relationship with money has changed for the better will create advocates. Advocates are motivated by dual forces: they want to help others by spreading your value and they want to help their advisor. This is a powerful combination.

There are many ways advisors create client transformations. Here are three real-life examples from my coaching clients:

Example 1: Brook is an advisor who believes that at the heart of proper financial planning is cash flow management and works diligently with her clients in this area. Tending to this basic concept allows her clients to save and invest more money than they had been. This, in turn, allows them to do things and have things they previously thought weren't possible. Brook said that many of her clients have told her, "You have transformed our life".

Most advisors know how cash flow management is in the planning process, but few make it a focus of their work – to both their clients' and their detriment.

Example 2: In Stephen's client onboarding process (the first 90 days) he works with many of his clients to develop a vision board (sometimes called a dream board). Using photos, his clients bring to life their dreams and goals – who they want to be, where they want to go, want they want to have, and who they want to help.

In this process, Stephen not only helps his clients get clear about their future, but he also helps them create special accounts to accomplish these goals. After all, there's nothing worse than an "unfunded dream".

It's one thing to learn about your clients' goals and dreams. It's another thing to keep them at the forefront in the relationship so they turn into reality.

Example 3: Lester takes a similar approach at Stephen by learning his clients' bucket lists. In some cases, he ensures they set aside the funds. In other cases, he makes relevant introductions or simply keeps these goals alive for his clients.

Great advice and great service create loyal clients. Client transformations create advocates.

Get Unsolicited Referrals That Fit

The key to receiving referrals and introductions that fit is education. Prospects, clients, and COIs need to know who fits and who doesn't and they need to know how to recognize when someone might value the advisor's work.

But before we go there, let me make an important point. If a prospect isn't the right fit for an advisor, then the advisor isn't right for that prospect. Taking on clients that aren't in an advisor's wheelhouse will create lose-lose-lose situations. The advisor loses by expending resources on a wrong-fit client. The client loses by working with someone who isn't right for them. And, if an introduction is involved, the introducer loses by facilitating an imperfect connection.

Educating Your Referral Sources

Teaching your referral sources who you serve the best – for whom your processes are best suited – serves two purposes. First, you reduce the number of wrong fit introductions. Second, you let your clients know that you are never too busy to see if you can be a resource for others.

Notice I said, "to see". Those are qualifying words. Also, notice I said, "who you serve the best" or "for whom your processes are best suited". I don't say, "Here's the type of person I'm looking for". Make this client centered, not advisor centered. It's a subtle and important distinction.

Be as specific as you like. If income or investible assets are important to you, then state those numbers – or a range of numbers. Say to the introducer, "You may not know the exact specifics of someone's situation, but you often have a sense. Not sure? I'm never too busy to have a conversation to see if I can be of service in some way. If I'm not the right advisor for them, I may have an associate who is a perfect fit".

What Happens If A Client Makes A Wrong Fit Introduction?

1. Your first line of defense against wrong-fit introduction is education.
2. Your second line of defense is qualifying the prospect. Over the phone or virtually, learn about them and let them know for whom your processes are best suited.

"What's most important is that you work with the right advisor for you. Someone whose processes are designed to help you reach your goals. Let's learn a bit about each other today to see if it makes sense to keep the conversation going".

Talk about the demographic and psychographic attributes of who you serve the best. It usually becomes clear quickly if the match is right. If it's not a fit and you have a colleague who is a good fit, then further the introduction.

IMPORTANT: If a client or COI makes a wrong-fit introduction, after you've completed your conversation with the prospect, immediately call the introducer and say something like, "Laura – I just had a nice conversation with George. He seems like a great guy. We determined that the timing isn't right for us to be working together at this moment. I do appreciate the trust you have in me and I look forward to the next opportunity."

Do not reveal any proprietary information. That wouldn't be appropriate. If George goes back to Laura with any negative energy, Laura has already heard from you and won't be wondering, "What did my advisor say to George "?

The All-Important "Value Discussion"

Of all the referral strategies, methods, and tactics I've been teaching for more than 30 years, without question, the most important one involves checking in with clients on a regular basis.

I've dubbed this important part of my system "the value discussion". The value discussion is just that – a discussion with clients to make sure you are meeting their expectations and that they are finding value in your process, products, and services.

Note – this is not fishing for compliments. This is helping prospects and clients get clear on the value they are experiencing. This is where they often wake up to the fact that this work has transformed their relationship with money and, therefore, their life.

Checking in with clients by conducting value discussions accomplishes at least two important things for an advisor:

1. Unmet expectations, unexpressed complaints, or other issues are discovered before they fester and poison the relationship. Clients tend to communicate the big problems to their advisor. But the unsaid little ones can hurt a relationship if the emotional charge isn't removed. This doesn't happen much but it's important to provide the opportunity.
2. By having them speak about what's working for them, they get very clear on the value they've experienced and want others to experience. That's why I call this a discussion . It's not a "value presentation" where the advisor merely talks about the value delivered And it's not a 'set up' that some advisors have been taught… "Have you found value in this meeting "? [Yes.] "Great! Who do you know…?"

Checking in with clients is the single most significant thing you can do to create a sense of engagement. Therefore, I strongly recommend that new clients (and even prospects) know that candid, ongoing communication is important to maintaining the overall working relationship's health. Make it clear that most meetings will have time set aside to discuss expectations and review the value of the work.

The Language Of The Value Discussion

Here are a few word tracks not intended for memorization but to stimulate customization.

First Or Second Meeting

We've covered quite a few concepts and ideas during this meeting. What stands out as the most interesting or valuable to you? And how might you prioritize what we've covered thus far?

Decision To Work With You

I hope you know that you've made a significant – possibly life-changing decision – to move forward with this important work. As we've discussed, many smart and successful people put off this important work and set up themselves, their families, and their businesses for problems down the road.

I know you had a lot of things to consider. What tipped the scales for you? What made you decide to move forward?

Delivery Of A Financial Plan

We've been through quite a process to get to this point, have we not? If you don't mind, please tell me about the value you believe this entire process has brought to you. Maybe compare how you felt before we started working together versus how you feel today.

Review Meeting

(I prefer to call these progress meetings.)

Let's put the market aside and the economy aside for a minute and talk about things we can control — namely, our communication and overall working relationship. First, is there anything that's not working for you?

Any place you believe we've not met your expectations … or is there any part of our process or communication you think we can improve?

Shifting gears, what has been working for you? What do you like about our working relationship and all that we've been doing up to this point – to make sure we keep doing it for you and maybe other clients too?

*Always begin with the "what needs improvement" side of the discussion. If there is something that needs to be fixed or merely vented, that should be handled first and, hopefully, get it out of the way before moving on to what is working for them — what they do value.

Notice that all of these questions are open-ended in nature. It's important to get prospects and clients talking out loud. Neuroscience supports the fact that speaking things out loud adds to clarity of understanding.

The value discussion can be fit into just about any meeting but be careful not to overdo it. Use best judgement but err on the side of overcommunicating around this topic rather than under communicating.

Encourage Introductions

As I mentioned previously, I believe that advisors should be willing to ask for introductions. I can't tell you how many times I've heard my coaching clients say, "Bill – Is there a way to ask for referrals without looking like that 'creepy referral guy'?"

Yes! Of course, there is.

But this article is about unsolicited referrals, i.e., referrals without asking. So, we'll save "asking without pushing, pleading, begging, or bribing" for a future article.

Planting Referral Seeds

In my book "The Language of Referrals" I teach 11 different ways to promote or encourage the possibility of introductions (short of asking directly). Here are three of them:

1. "Don't keep me a secret." (Or – don't keep this important work a secret.)

This is not for everyone. This has a "smile" at the end of it. So, if you don't have a sense of humor, don't use this one. We have plenty of other options.

Larry is an advisor in Westchester, NY. Larry was with a client on a Friday morning and (as I had coached him) said to her), "I'm glad you're feeling great about the work we've been doing together. You know I'm never too busy to see if I can be a resource for your family and friends. Please don't keep me a secret".

Late that Friday afternoon, Larry received a call from this client's sister. "Larry – my sister has told me great things about you. How soon can we meet to discuss my situation?"

They scheduled a meeting for the following Monday. At that meeting the sister committed to transferring $940,000 dollars to Larry's care.

Larry told me, "This was the fastest turn around from prospect to client I think I've ever had. It pays to say, 'Don't keep me a secret' and to work a little late on Fridays".

Yohance was a guest on my podcast and told me that he had been using this phrase he heard from me for many years. He told me that he has fun with this phrase with his clients (mostly emergency room physicians) and often says to them, "You aren't keeping me a secret are you?"

2. "Share the Experience"

I had an advisor come up to me after a presentation to his broker dealer to ask, "I know that some advisors like your 'Don't keep me a secret' line. But I don't feel comfortable saying that. Do you have anything else that's similar?"

You know I do, "I'm glad you're finding this process help. Please share the experience."

3. "How I Handle Referrals"

There are three primary reasons advisory clients don't give referrals or make introductions:

First – they are concerned about confidentiality.

Second – they don't know how that referral or introduction will be handled. Therefore, as an unknown, it can feel like a risk. So, it's not a natural inclination for them.

Third – they've had a previous bad experience.

Advisors want to assure their prospects, clients, and centers of influence that they won't be taking a risk when introducing you to others. This reassuring conversation can happen at just about any time in a relationship – even in the early stages. And, by the way, you can do this in person, on the phone, or in a virtual meeting:

Advisor: George, there's something I want to run by you. Many of my clients like to introduce me and the work I do to others. I just wanted you to know that when that opportunity presents itself, you will know exactly what that will look like and how I will handle it, so you'll feel comfortable.

First, you can be assured that everything we do is held in complete confidence. They will never learn anything about your financial situation from me … and vice versa. Even with your family members or close friends, we don't cross that line.

Second, I don't like to contact people without them first knowing a little bit about who I am and why I'm reaching out. I don't like to surprise people and make them wonder, "Why did George give my number out to this person?" Makes sense?

Client: Sure does.

Advisor: What I've found works best for all concerned is that when you think of one or more people, you and I speak first to see if the fit is right and then to discuss a method of introduction that feels comfortable to you and to the folks we're contacting. And, if we're lucky, we just might spark their interest in a conversation with me. It's important for you to know that I handle introductions very carefully, without any pressure whatsoever. How does this sound?

This is always an easy ' yes'. And you've planted a very powerful seed. Don't be surprised if this results in spontaneous introductions from time to time. I've seen it happen quite a bit.

Don't Settle For Word Of Mouth Or Weak Referrals

There was a time when a client could say, "Call George and use my name," and that would actually work. Back then, people answered their phones even if they didn't know who was calling.

Those days are long gone.

That's why it's so important to secure an introduction from the client (or COI) to a prospect.

Although you can't control either what your introducer will do or the prospect's response, there are a few things you can do to increase your chances of snagging an effective connection – one where the prospect will respond.

Five Principles To Consider

Here are the five key principles of referrals and introductions you want to take into account:

1. Protection: Although your introducer usually wants the connection to happen, protecting their relationship with the friend, family member, colleague, or client is their primary concern.
2. Connection: Although you respect your introducer's priorities, your primary concern is negotiating an introduction that sparks the prospect's interest in speaking with you.
3. Collaboration: The introduction process needs to be collaborative. You want to encourage your introducer to work with you to produce a comfortable and effective introduction.
4. Relevance: If the message conveyed to the prospect is not relevant to them, they won't be interested and will ignore it. What your introducer says in the introduction and how you follow up must be as relevant to the new prospect as possible.

Trust and Credibility: The trust and credibility between the introducer and prospect are critical. In the best introductions, there's typically a great deal of trust and respect between the introducer and the prospect.

The Email Handshake

Another strategy advisors can use to generate connections is the "email handshake". In fact, the email handshake is my favorite way to make introductions. It's efficient and protects relationships. Plus, many introducers will feel more comfortable sending an email over trying to track someone down for a conversation.

Think of it this way. You're having lunch with a friend. Another friend happens to enter the same restaurant. You introduce them to each other.

ADVISOR: Michael, meet Marissa. She runs a very successful consulting business. Marissa, meet Michael. He's been my financial advisor for years. One thing the two of you have in common is a passion for golf. We should all get together for a round sometime this year.

This same dynamic can be applied to an email introduction. Having the introducer tell the prospect why, specifically, they are making this introduction adds to its effectiveness. In the example that follows, the client, George Jones, is introducing his friend Laura Smith to his financial professional, Bob Green.

TO: Laura Smith (Prospect), Bob Green (Advisor)

FROM: George Jones (Client/Introducer)

SUBJECT: Introducing two great people

Laura, do you remember that conversation we had about retiring without having to take a pay cut? Well, I want you to meet Bob Green. Bob has been guiding Sandra and me through this process and he's really opened our eyes to a few things we need to put in place to achieve our long-term goals. Most importantly, we feel much more relaxed and confident about our future as we continue to work with Bob.

Bob, meet Laura. Laura and I have known each other for years. She's one of the smartest and most well-connected people I know. She's also a great golfer. If you guys play together, don't bet any money. It won't go well for you.

Laura, I highly recommend you speak with Bob. I'm sure it will be time well invested. If you like, maybe the three of us can meet for lunch next week.

As you can see, this is a pretty simple process. Many advisors like to create a template to give the introducer to help them come up with their own effective email introduction:

Advisor: George, I have an example of what I have in mind that I'll email to you. If you can emulate that template in some way, that would be perfect. Most of your words and details will be different, of course, but the example I provide should be helpful. How's that sound?

Client: I think I've got the idea but send the template. It will remind me! Happy to do this.

Advisor: To make sure I don't miss your email and so I can follow up appropriately, can you give me a sense of when you'll be able to get to this? I want to keep an eye open for your email to Laura.

To see many more suggested word tracks, check out The Language of Referrals.

Referrals Are Always Easier In A Clear Target Market

I could write an entire book on why advisors should consider focusing on a well-defined target market. With that said, this article wouldn't be complete if I didn't at least mention this winning strategy.

As a way to create differentiation that really matters and amp up their organic growth, more and more advisors are finding value in narrowing their focus to target a well-defined niche or target market.

There are a few benefits that come with proactively focusing on a target market:

1. More perceived and tangible value to clients.
2. Messaging is more relevant and compelling. Catches attention and creates action.
3. They know people like themselves and become advocates.
4. Establishes a reputation that attracts ideal clients.
5. Business is more efficient and more profitable.

Five Common Target Markets For Financial Advisors

(There are many other examples, but these are the most common.)

1. Employees in medium or large companies.
2. Business owners in a specific industry. The narrower the better.
3. Medical Practices
4. University Faculty & Administrators
5. Affinity Groups such as: athletes, philanthropists, and parents of children with special needs.

Many of the advisors whom I interviewed for my Top Advisor Podcast have had great success in focusing on a target market, ranging from optometrists to professional athletes to Google employees.

For most advisors, referrals in and of themselves are not the end goal. The true goal is to grow their practice organically, building relationships with right-fit clients along the way. Organic growth works best with processes designed to acquire new clients through the path of least resistance – for the advisor and for the prospective client.

Ultimately, it's about building a reputation, having processes in place, and providing transformative experiences so strong that clients feel confident saying: "You should talk to my advisor".

When you build advocacy intentionally, unsolicited referrals to the right-fit clients stop being random and start becoming predictable!